My Life has Completely Jumped the Shark

As of last night I am pretty sure that I have suddenly found myself in an alternate universe where nothing goes like I plan and I am the laziest human being in the world.

Well, I guess most of that sentence would be true no matter what dimension I'm living in (getting up before 10 should be a crime, people.) but the part about my plans going so far off track that they end up in another state is totally true.

In the interest of keeping my family issues family issues and not "SuperCareo likes to air the family laundry on the internet, she's out of the will" issues I am going to give you a bulleted list of how my effort to get my boyfriend and my parents in the same room backfired so spectacularly well that I don't know that they will ever be in the same room ever again:

• Armini wants to go to dinner, I suggest a mexican place over by my parent's house and throw out the suggestion that he come over there after to hang out
• We eat, have a lovely meal and come home to discover that my mother has flown the coop
• We head to the basement to watch a movie, Dad comes down with beers (odd) and then pulls up a chair and asks us to stop the movie because "we need to talk" (cue the blood chilling panic)
• Dad proceeds to inform Armini that my mother is more or less blaming him for me leaving, unfairly, and that both he and my mother agree that he is "unworthy of our daughter"
• Dad leaves, Armini and I look at each other in silence (because there are no. words.)
• Armini leaves I go and watch the movie on my laptop in bed. Alone. Thanks, Dad.

I mean, how does this happen? How do you react to that? I am so at a loss for what to do at this point that I'm thinking I'm just going to pretend that last night ever happened and hope that someday everyone will forget about it.

Except now that I wrote about it on the internet, I suppose that plan's already not going to work.

THANKS INTERNET.

PS - you can learn about the whole jumping the shark thing here. Don't worry, I had to look it up the first time I heard someone say it, too.

PPS - all of my suitcases are, for the most part, packed and ready to go. 5 days before I leave. I am starting to get pretty excited ...