Spider Epiphanies

One of the worst things about living alone is the living alone part.

Which, duh SuperCareo, didn't you know that before you decided to move out?

But it's not so much that as that one time I lived with a boy and he was around to do the icky stuff like plunge the toilet or kill the crazy big spiders I find in my dresser - which happened the other night, BTW. Which is what brought this whole thing on.

So I opened my dresser drawer and there is a spider looking up at me - clearly ready to jump up and eat me if given the chance. So what do I do? I text my friend Ashley in call caps stating that I NEED A BOY!!!!!!! (and yes, there were that many exclamation points involved).

But the good news is that I did kill the spider with minimal squealing and I was not eaten (thank the lord). But the moment made me pause and think about my independence and being a woman hear me roar and blah, blah, blah. Did wanting a boy (Armini specifically) to kill the spider make me less of a woman? Have I somehow lost that bit of myself (without realizing it) that makes me brave enough to kill the spider?

I know ... killing a spider with a shoe isn't usually a moment for epiphanies.

But, all things considered, I think it's ok. It's not the first time I have wanted made boys to kill bugs for me. All I think it means is that living back here (I am living in the same complex where Armini and I lived before he left for China) makes me miss him and in that moment I just missed him more than normal.

GAH. He hasn't decided if he's coming home to stay when the school year ends, so please keep your fingers crossed for me. I am so tired of this game. Also, I am tired of killing my own bugs.

I'm Back ...

And I'm sorry for not posting before now. I've been back in the states for about a month now and I haven't written one post about anything that happened during my month in China (and yes, I spent it with Armini. And yes, it was everything I had hoped it would be), or the fact that I've moved (kind of - it's day 4 and I still haven't spent the night there) or the fact that I think I may have to go into rehab because of my new found addiction to M&M's.

Also, I'm not kidding about the M&M's thing. I literally begged my brother to bring me some last night because I hadn't had any in about 3 days and was on the verge of losing it.

So anyway ... I went to Southeast Asia! It was great. Plus I got to see this guy:

We think he may have a career as a bike cop.

We went to 3 countries - China, Laos and Thailand. Laos was my favorite. The food was fabulous, so fabulous in fact that I ate pretty much all the time and so much that I made myself

sick on more than one occasion (because I am a 5 year old who has no self control what-so-ever). Plus it's where I turned 25 (UGH) and we got to go tubing in Vang Vieng (hooray!).

Since I've been back I've started working all the time because the trip completely cleaned me out, something I wasn't as prepared for as I thought I was. Also, adjusting to this stupid-cold-winter-weather-that-never-ends has been hard. Kiss my little bity tan goodbye!

I promise that I have more posts lined up (I've already started a few of them!), I just wanted to get this out there just in case anyone was wondering if I died.

How To Survive In Life

It's that time again ... time to brave crowds at the mall make out those lists for Santa think about what we would like to do a little differently in our lives in the coming year. And to get excited to open some presents (let's just be honest with each other).

Ok - so maybe most people start thinking about resolutions and all that after the 25th. What can I say? I like to get a jump start on these things. Plus it's not like changing the way I do things hasn't been on my mind lately or anything (ha).

But as I was sitting around thinking about how totally, rock your face off awesome 2010 is going to be I was struck with a thought. A thought that made me think of this one post I wrote at the start of 2009 called Sometimes I Wonder How I Survive In Life. It's a question I've been asking myself a lot lately.

ANYWAY. So I was thinking about making a list for myself of Ways TO Survive in Life.

2009 was a big year for me in terms of things I learned about life and about myself and I think it would make a nice addition to my usual set of 10 (or so) resolutions for the year. And then I thought that it would be enlightening to see what the blogging community would have to add to such a list.

So I'm turning it over to you guys. I want to hear about how YOU are going to survive in the coming year. Tweet it! Collect ideas from your friends! I will post everything I get on January 6th, two days before I leave for China. And yes, you can send me as many ideas as you would like.

I'll go first ...

1. Sometimes you just have to make the decision and deal with the fall out after the fact (especially if it's something you know you really want).
2. Dealing with bad situations with grace is harder than you might think.
3. Sometimes the second (or 3rd ... or 16th) cookie/piece of cake/chocolate frosted doughnut with rainbow sprinkles is necessary in order to avoid a mental breakdown.
4. A good friend is more valuable than anything else in the world.
   

Growing Up Might Not be that Bad After All

Something happened to me yesterday morning ... the thing is that I'm not sure exactly what exactly it is that happened.

Confused yet? Welcome to the party. I've only had to delete and re-start this post about 4 times already.

I have spent a lot of the last year complaining about growing up and finding a direction for my life and all the other usual 20-something type gripping I've been hearing from all of my real life 20-something friends. But I woke up this morning and just felt ... weird. Different.

But weird and different in a good way.

Like, I didn't want to hit the snooze button so many times that I would have to skip my shower and breakfast in order to make it to work on time. Like, I laid in bed and visualized myself in my own apartment (for the record: I have never used visualization as a motivational technique) and it made me excited to get out of bed. Like, I was right on it and had about 2 things checked off my To-Do List for the day before I was even out of the door.

Different like I am actually ready to grow up.

I know, right? I was beginning to think it would never happen. I have no idea what triggered it, however, because my life hasn't been very grown-up lately. But I can't help but feel that it has something to do with the nearness of my nightmare inducing 25th birthday. I think it's acting like the pop timer you find in turkeys, it lets you know when it's time to take it out of the oven.

Sorry about that. I couldn't help myself.

Have any of you had a pop-up timer moment yet (really, I'm sorry. I'll stop.)?

The Day the Scary Movie Followed Me Home

One of the things that I absolutely love about nannying is getting to watch movies during the day when everyone else is sitting at a desk being bored and sad a productive member of society (Dear HBO On Demand - I love you. Call me. Seriously.)

Anyway, yesterday I got up the courage (yes, courage - I'm a wimp when it comes to scary movies) to watch The Mist. Well ... I half watched it.

I may or may not be re-reading Twilight and I may or may not have been way more interested in reading about werewolf-vampire-teenage girl love triangles: which are way less scary than giant, people eating bug-aliens sneaking around in crazy fog.

But the worst part was when I came home and discovered this in my bathroom sink:

It's an assassin beetle and while, yes it is a creepy ass looking bug to start with, normally I would ok with it. I probably would have even taken it outside myself (I say probably because I have days when I cannot even handle the thought of touching a bug). However, given that I had just watched a movie where the bad buys were bigger versions of this, I screamed like a little girl, hid in my room and made my brother deal with it.

Ewwwwww.

Thank You, Thank You, Thank You

Today I would like to do what everyone else is doing and send a giant, huge THANK YOU to everyone currently in uniform and anyone who has ever worn one.

And I would like to challenge everyone else to make everyday Veteran's Day. My mother, whenever we are somewhere and she spots someone in uniform or an older person with a hat, she will go out of her way to go over to them and thank them for serving.

I used to think it was embarrassing but then one day I was out with some friends for lunch and right in front of me was a gentleman in uniform. On a whim I tapped him on the shoulder and thanked him for serving.

The look in his eyes is something that will never, ever forget. It was clear that he really appreciated being thanked. He grinned at me and thanked me and shook my hand.

My challenge to you, and myself, is to start thanking all the veterans you meet. Just because it's not November 11th doesn't mean that they don't deserve to be appreciated.

I think I am in love

Lately I have spent 90 - 100% of my time making goals for myself and doing my damnedest to get them done. Anything that helps me get said goals taken care of I am pretty much an instant fan of.

And with that in mind I give you this totally awesome thing:


So cute right? They, and other totally awesome and adorable things (all of which I want now), at Mary Kate Devitt's Etsy shop. If anyone feels like sending me a present, I would not be opposed to finding one of these in my mailbox.